Lullaby
by Invader Dana
Summary: The sequel to The Night of the Tooth Fairy. Dib decides to once again use a sleeping gel on Zim and bring him to the S.E.N. He doesn't exactly get there however since I lurve picking on Dib. Read it now!
1. Chapters 1 and 2

-A/N: Wooh meh 3rd story on here! I want to thank you all for the nice reviews I received on my last 2 stories! Now, the reason I have 2 chapters in 1 is because these chapters are short and aren't meant to be combined. This story also starts off slow, but once you get into it I think you'll like it. Wee!-

Chapter 1

Rain. It's that dreary substance that falls from the sky in tiny drops or in massive sheets, depending on how much the cloud decides to release. Sometimes it stings people with its iciness on cold days or warms them on other days. The story begins on a gloomy day in late August. It was a steady rain; the droplets were warm and continued to pour throughout the entire day. Most people stayed indoors, except for the few who needed to run errands every so often. The weather was so bleak that it caused great irritation to certain individuals, one being Zim.

He had diminished his supply of paste weeks ago due to the frequent number of thunderstorms in his area. Because there was none left, he hadn't gone to school in several weeks. He realized Dib would become very suspicious if he didn't return soon. Earlier Gir had suggested Zim should make his own paste. It would have been perfect if Gir had not said, "Water and flour makes paste! I saw that on TV once!" The problem wasn't how Zim would mix the two substances without burning his skin. He just didn't have the flour. The only way to get some would require him to go out into the rain. A loophole wasn't what Zim had in mind. And he certainly couldn't trust Gir to buy flour for him. He would just have to wait it out. He would be waiting for a long time.

During the time Zim would be waiting, Dib would be compiling information dealing with the most powerful of sleeping gels.

Chapter 2

"What are you trying to do son? And why are you playing in my lab?" Professor Membrane asked with his hands on his hips. Dib groaned and placed his father's gravity stick aside. The gravity stick was an invention created by Membrane and two other scientists in the Membrane labs. Its use was to alter gravity without having to be in space. If someone were to be zapped by it, he or she would start floating away until zapped again. "I'm not playing around in here dad! Playing is for kids who don't think an alien is out there trying to destroy Earth! Right now I'm decoding a sleeping gel formula that is written in another language," Dib explained as he pointed to the computer in front of him.

"So you are. What are you doing with my gravity stick then? You know you're supposed to ask me before touching any of my lab equipment." Dib picked up the gravity stick in his hands and looked it over before saying, "I considered zapping Zim with this so he'd just float away and Earth would be saved from his clutches." Membrane tore the gravity stick from Dib's hands in one swift motion and glowered at him. "This was not meant to be used as a toy! It's not a water gun! Besides, it has backfired on several people. Poor, poor Frank…" Dib lowered his voice and asked, "What happened to Frank?" His dad shook his head sadly and walked out of the room. "Oookay…that idea went down the drain," Dib muttered.


	2. Chapters 3 and 4

Chapter 3

Zim paced his living room several times, pausing every now and then in hope that he would think of a decent plan to obtain the paste he needed. He was at loss for ideas and growled at Gir to give him one. The robot paid him no mind and continued with his activity, which happened to be sketching "masterpieces" on the wall in permanent marker. Zim glanced out the window, noticing the rain picking up. The street was partially flooded and a child's ball was floating along. A chill went down Zim's spine as he watched the rain pour. "Gah, I should've bought that raingear the humans were trying to sell me at the store! Gir why didn't you let me buy the filth?" Zim said. Gir looked up with a confused expression. "I told you you should buy that. But you said 'no Gir, we don't need human junky junk stuff!' Don't blame me for your mistakes," he stated. Zim was stunned. He half whispered, "Gir, that's the first time you remembered something in such great detail!" When Zim realized he had just admitted that he made a mistake he quickly added, "It's still your fault ya' know." Gir smiled for reasons unknown and began humming the tune of the Invader Zim theme song. Zim sighed and retreated into the kitchen for a snack.

Chapter 4

Dib finally decoded the formula after deciding to use his father's translating system. It had been a difficult task as each individual word was in another language than the previous one. Dib thought it was a way to keep the formula a secret from wandering eyes. If that was the case, it wasn't a secret anymore. To actually create the formula, Dib would have to follow the seemingly bizarre instructions. From what he read, he realized how long it would take him to gather up all the ingredients. The instructions were pretty easy and slowly grew more challenging further down the line. "It's telling me to get all of the ingredients before I begin. Don't you have to do that for all recipes? Anyway the first one is sugar. We have that. Then it's three cups of shredded nylon socks. Nylon socks!?" Dib questioned the formula. He had no idea how sugar and nylon socks mixed with other ingredients could create a very powerful sleeping gel. He would just have to wait and see. In the meantime, he scavenged through his drawers to see if he even _had_ nylon socks.

At Zim's base, the Irken was munching on cookies at the kitchen table. As he popped a third one into his mouth, he began thinking about other ways in which he could protect himself from the ceaseless rain. He noticed a rubber band on the floor and stared at it for a moment. Then he called for Gir in an unnecessarily loud voice and waited for him. Gir entered the kitchen and opened his mouth, revealing his tongue that he colored black with the marker earlier. Zim sighed. He said, "Rubber bands are made of rubber right Gir?" "How am I supposed to know?" Gir shrugged. Taking Gir's question as a yes, Zim went on. "And don't scuba divers wear rubber suit things when they do whatever they do in the ocean?" "I guess so. Where're you goin' with this?" Gir said. "Oh, you'll find out soon enough Gir. But I have to make a call to the Tallest first, " Zim replied.


	3. Chapters 5 and 6

Chapter 5

As soon as the communications officer informed the Tallest that there was an incoming transmission from Zim, they flinched. "Didn't he just call us last week??" Purple almost yelled, raising his arms in the air. Red narrowed his eyes and folded his arms. Through gritted teeth, he muttered, "_Yes_." Purple signaled the officer to put Zim on. "Greetings, my Tallest! I am calling you because I have a request!" Zim said. Red pulled his hand down his face in annoyance. "Let me guess, you want more battle tanks already," he replied. "Er…no my Tallest, although I _could_ use another one about now," Zim hinted hopefully. He then said, "However, the disgusting rain has been quite a burden, as I have told you not too long ago. I need some of those new Advanced Rubber Suits to protect myself from the rain." The Tallest merely looked at each other and blinked. Red imagined Zim trying to make his own rubber suit and having it blow in his face. Purple was thinking about turning Zim into a giant donut since he was hungry at the moment. Since they both didn't want Zim to obtain protective gear of any kind, Red fabricated a lie. "Sorry Zim, but those suits were redesigned to shield Invaders from…radishes," he said. Zim quirked an eye in confusion. "Radishes?" Zim asked. Red answered, "Yeah, we don't know what those are either but they sure are deadly, right Purple?" "Oh yes!" Purple burst out excitedly. "You'll have to make one of your own suits Zim," Red said nodding. Sighing, Zim saluted and said, "Well, thanks for the radish warning I guess. Invader Zim sighing off!" When the screen turned to black again, the Tallest couldn't hold in their laughter any longer. "This calls for a snack party!" They yelled.

Meanwhile Dib found a few old pairs of nylon socks and went back to the list. Aloud he thought, "The next ingredient is cheesecake!?"

Chapter 6

Dib groaned in frustration; he realized that he'd have to go to the store and buy cheesecake himself. "I wonder if this formula is a rip-off. I mean I _did_ find it on the Internet. I need money too. Maybe Gaz will lend me some of hers," Dib sighed knowing the chances of that. "In a million years maybe," he added. He found Gaz on the couch playing her usual Game Slave while watching Bloaty's Pizza Hog commercials. He stepped in front of the TV. Bad idea. Gaz seethed with rage and roared menacingly. "I WAS WATCHING THAT YOU LUNKHEAD! MOVE OR SUFFER MY WRATH!" Fire rose from behind her as she glared at him. Dib gulped and hurriedly jumped out of her way. The fire disappeared instantly. "Er, sorry about that, but can ya' loan me some money?" Dib asked nervously. Gaz shrugged and handed twenty dollars to Dib. "Buy me "Vampire Piggies from the Underworld Series 4" for my GS2 and all shall be forgiven," she said. Dib stared at the money his sister had given him. "But I need this to buy cheesecake, not your stupid game," Dib explained. Gaz gave him a scathing look and fire emerged from behind her once more…

Zim paced his lab several times and Gir grew dizzy of watching. "I don't have the materials to make rubber! I should but I don't! Gir, I am at a loss of what to do! Give me IDEAS!!" Gir decided to play Follow-the-Leader and paced around like his master. It wasn't long before Zim noticed this and he yelled, "This is not the time for play Gir! How can you be happy when I have no way of leaving my base??" Gir spun in a circle. "You need to lighten up masta' and throw mud all over the ceiling and your little ship! It'd make you _happy_!" "You're a genius!" Zim said to Gir excitedly; the robot giggled and continued spinning. "I can get paste by going to that store in my voot! Why hadn't I thought of this sooner!?" Zim put on his disguise, ran off to his cruiser, and hopped inside with Gir. With that, he flew it to the store.


	4. Chapters 7 and 8

Chapter 7

Once Zim was in the store-after crashing into it-he raced to the rubber band isle. Gir ran off to the customer service desk to annoy the living daylights out of the workers there. On his way to the rubber band isle, Zim passed the paste isle, but didn't notice it. His mind was on a totally different matter. He didn't know how many bags of rubber bands to buy so he took them all. Then he scrambled to the checkout line, which was very long. "Hurry up! I don't have all day stink people!"

Dib walked in the store at that moment and saw Zim in line. He quirked his eye. "Zim! What the heck are you doing here!? I thought you were afraid of rain!" Dib yelled; his foe growled. "What's it to you worm?" Zim snarled. "I'll find out your little plan to destroy Earth! You can count on it!" Keeping his eyes fixated on Zim, Dib left to get a box of cheesecake. "Next," the cashier said. The line moved up, but Zim was still last.

"What do you get when you mix cheese with cupcakes?" Gir asked the customer service. "Uh, cheese is in isle four and cupcakes are in isle eleven," the manager replied dully. Gir stared intently at them in a positively creepy way. He continued staring at them for five minutes before screaming, "WHERE'S MY POT OF GOLD!?" After that he zoomed back to Zim. "Potato?" He asked; Zim shook his head confused and put his bags on the conveyer belt.

Chapter 8

Zim threw a wad of money at the cashier and left with his hoard of rubber bands. Gir didn't follow Zim out but went to find Dib instead. He found Dib in the baking goods isle and poked him. "Hiya' buddy! Whatcha' doin'!?" Dib pushed the little robot aside, only to have Gir move exactly where he had been. Sighing, Dib asked, "What do you want?" Gir shrugged, but poked Dib some more. He liked poking Dib; he saw it as his new hobby. Dib turned round yet again and yanked Gir away from him. "Leave me alone!" Gir shook his head, smiling. Finally he screamed, "I KNOW MASTA'S PLAN!" Dib scratched his head before saying, "Really? Tell me what it is!" "'Kay! Zim plans to cover the WHOLE Earth with melting nacho cheese for his leaders to eat! I CAN HARDLY WAIT!" Gir said. Dib asked, "Are you sure you know what you're talking about?" Gir didn't say anything because he heard Zim calling him from the exit. He ran off to meet his master. Dib pondered what Gir had said. "If that's true, then I have to speed up the sleeping gel process. The next ingredient is a bumper from a car. Okay…"

[-Just for laughs!-]

In the Massive, the Tallest are having their snacks party as the crew members watch them. "Can we have some snacks too, my Tallest?" They say hopefully. Purple glares at them and hugs his donuts tight. He roars, "STAY AWAY FROM MY DONUTS!" Following this, there is a long awkward silence. An eerie silence. After a moment, Purple says, "Sure, you can have a snack!"


	5. Chapters 9 and 10

Chapter 9

"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard you say," Zim said after Gir told him what he had said to Dib. "That plan would be a waste of my time anyhow. Besides, only ZIM can plot plans of terror! Your plan would never work!" Gir didn't mind that Zim was insulting him; he probably wouldn't know he was being insulted anyway. He just smiled at Zim while playing with a mouse pad. The mouse pad had a picture of a spoon on it, but that isn't important, so let's not bring it up again. Zim went about making his rubber suits, and busied himself by melting the rubber bands in a heating unit. When the rubber was in a liquid form, he poured it into several different molds in which the suits would be made of. He then brought the molds to a cooling room where they would harden. Later he would take them out and piece the various molds together to make the suits.

Dib scavenged through his garage to find a car bumper. Of course, there wasn't one. He glanced at the list again and groaned. "Dang, I read that last ingredient wrong! It isn't a bumper from a car! It's a bumper _car_! Where am I gonna' get a bumper car!?" He shoved the list in his pocket and turned around to see his sister growling at him. "So, where's my game? Huh Dib?" Dib slapped his forehead, realizing that he had forgotten to get Gaz her game. He shook his head. "I don't have it. PLEASE DON'T HURT ME AGAIN!" Gaz snarled in resentment. "You know what this means!" She pulled out a pair of scissors. "This is for your own good…" She snipped off the top of Dib's pointy hair and went inside the house. Dib dropped to the ground screaming, "NOOOOOOOOOO! NOT THE POINTY HAIR! NOOOOOOOOO!"

Chapter 10

Dib cried. Then he cried some more. Pretty sad really. Pathetic even. Yes indeedy! After he got over the loss of his hair ten minutes later, he fused the pointy part back to his head with his dad's Fusion Excel, which he wasn't supposed to use by the way. The Fusion Excel was just in its developmental stage and didn't work as well as it should. When Dib used it, his hair caught on fire momentarily. Luckily-or unluckily for me-none of his hair burnt off. Dib screamed anyway, causing Professor Membrane to come running into the lab. "What's wrong son?" He said. Dib hid the Fusion Excel behind his back. "Nothing…" Then he added, "Don't you feel the need to scream every once in a while?" Membrane stared at Dib for a moment. "No son, I don't," Membrane said; Dib blinked. His dad shooed Dib out of the lab so he could start on a new invention. Once upstairs, Dib started talking to himself. "Maybe I should find a different sleeping gel. The one I'm making doesn't make any sense. First it's sugar and socks. Then cheesecake and bumper cars. None of those things would make me tired. Guh…" He went to his room and sat on the bed. He looked at his computer and did a double take. "What the heck?" For some reason or another, it was vibrating…

Zim was just finishing piecing together his first rubber suit. At that very moment, it stopped raining.


	6. Chapters 11 and 12

Chapter 11

He edged over to the computer cautiously in fear of sudden explosion, implosion, or other catastrophic event. It didn't do any such thing. It only continued to vibrate. Dib was standing in front of it now, eying the screen carefully. A series of words typed themselves onto the screen. The monitor appeared to be producing an eerie green glow that spread out across the room and onto Dib's face. Usually, things that glow are best left alone. Other people would scream freakishly, point, and/or run if they saw something glowing, especially if its color was green. Dib wasn't one of those people…unless he is and we just don't know it. When the words were finished being placed upon the screen, the computer immediately stopped vibrating. Everything was quiet until Dib's printer clicked on by itself. Dib jumped in response, but remained where he was to see the next phase come to life. He pulled out the finished product and looked it over. It was instructions for creating a sensible, yet powerful sleeping gel that would only take a couple of hours to make. Underneath that was a note from Agent Cypress that read:

Agent Darkbootie got wind of you finding a false sleeping gel on the Internet. He wants me to let you know that you're an idiot for being so stupid to fall for that nonsense. Everyone here at the Network agrees with him. However, he has also requested that I send you the above so you can actually get this alien to sleep, if indeed it's an alien and not another Internet gimmick.

P.S: Don't send us another "gift" next Christmas. The last one exploded.

Dib read the note once more before putting it down. "That was harsh. BUT NOW I'LL BE ABLE TO PROVE ZIM'S EXISTENCE TO THE WORLD!" He victoriously screeched. Gaz came barging into Dib's room. "Can it Dib! You ruined my commercial viewing time! It was Bloaty! BLOATY!" She yelled. Dib grabbed the instructions, opened his window, and made his way down the zip line to the ground. When he was on his feet, he glanced back at his window and stuck his tongue out at Gaz.

Chapter 12

From upstairs, Gir yelled, "Masta' the clouds ain't crying no mores!" In proper English, it would have meant it stopped raining. But what's the fun in using proper English when you can say such words as ain't? Either way, Zim understood what Gir was saying. He just didn't care. He suited up and ascended the elevator to the house level. He opened the front door and stepped out. Upon realization that there was no rain as Gir had said, Zim threw his arms in the air and screamed in much displeasure. All that time wasted when he could have been tearing the Earth in two instead. Figures.

Dib knew too well that he wouldn't be able to go back into his house without having to face Gaz. He also couldn't work in his father's lab after the whole "screaming just for the heck of it ordeal". He thought, 'I could always sneak into Zim's base again. That was so easy last time.' He quickly wiped that thought away from his mind. He realized that Zim only had Irken tools and the like. Then he un-wiped the idea from his mind. 'It's very easy to trick Zim into most anything. I could probably get him to help me create a sleeping gel that would really turn against him in the end. Dib likes this plan!' Dib thought. Then he said aloud, "I'm never going to think in third person again!"

[-Another Just for laughs!-]

Meanwhile, the Tallest were still partying from earlier when a guard came in with a package for them. He saluted and said, "This is for you from an anonymous source. We think it's safe to open." Purple snatched the package. "Oooh goody! Present!" He tore the wrapping off and flung it over his shoulder. It was a radish. Red poked it. "Ow it zapped me!" He yelped. Purple threw it on the ground and it melted through the floor. The Tallest looked at each other. Together they said, "They _are _deadly!"


	7. Chapters 13 and 14

Chapter 13

Dib was standing in front of Zim's door ten minutes after creeping himself out in the previous chapter. He rang the doorbell. No answer. He knocked this time. The door swung open by Gir. "Heya' big head boy, masta's in his playroom downstairs. Didja' bring the green bean casserole!?" "Uh…can I come in?" Dib asked, grimacing at the disturbing thought of casserole. He had bad memories of being fed mutant casserole by the aliens that abducted him when he was a baby. Gir nodded vigorously. "Wanna' watch TV with me?" Gir asked. "No, that's okay. I'll just go to the lab." Gir looked sad; his antenna drooped. Dib sighed saying, "Maybe later." Gir brightened up and scampered to the couch. Dib descended the trashcan to Zim's "playroom".

"That was pointless," Zim was mumbling when his rival appeared before him. "I could've-DIB! What is your filthy self doing in my even filthier lair!?" Zim cried out. Dib grinned. He said, "We have to be partners for a school project that involves helping me make a delicious snack juice shake thing." "Snack juice eh? How do you know of the mighty Irken SNACK JUICE!?" Dib was puzzled-he had just made that up. "Oh, it's very popular on Earth yeah. Crushed snacks in the form of juice is very…appetizing." "Why would you need my assistance if you know how to make one then?" Zim said suspiciously. Dib shrugged. He replied, "It's a new recipe and I'm too dumb to figure it out. Didn't you say your species is ten times more superior to the humans?" "Yes, I do remember saying that, although I may have changed the number to fifty million times instead of just ten." Dib sighed. "Will you help me then?"

"I feel it is my duty to show you how amazing my species is so I will aid you in the making of the snack juice!" Zim proclaimed.

Chapter 14

"Perfect…" Dib murmured. Zim looked at him. "What was that?" He asked. Dib shook his head and said, "Oh nothing. Hey, let's get started on that juice eh?" Zim nodded and asked for the recipe. "Hang on a sec," Dib said. He turned around and took out the recipe. He then rummaged through his pockets for a marker and crossed out Agent Cypress' note, along with any other indicator that it was a sleeping gel formula. When he was finished, he handed it to Zim. "I just had to cross out some unnecessary ingredients," he stated plainly. "Whatever," Zim said, taking the paper. He looked it over. "Hmm, I don't know why you bring this to me." Dib quirked an eye. "What do you mean?" He asked. "Well, it's just _so_ easy to make this! But then again, you aren't very intelligent, as I am. I AM ZIM-THE MOST SMARTEST OF ALL!" "You just said most smartest," Dib snickered. Zim lowered his arms after they had been raised during his outburst. "Eh…what about it?"

"Never mind."


End file.
